Saturday, January 31, 2015

This is not about they or those who take it upon themselves to define them. This is not even about your goal to define yourself. What I am talking about... what I am going to talk about is: what a person is. Yes, I will actively and consciously choose to end that sentence with "is".

There is a moment in every individual's life that defines who they will be, and how they will sum up their existence. For many, their sickness or disease will become who they are. For others, their career, worth, or success will do this. In others, friends, family, and self-love can convey their beingness. Or, may I even go far as to say, this will be their haecceity. For in the end, a "this" or a "that" is all we are. An object with thought and action. Considering the advancements in technology, to turn "this" into "you" or "I" is not a farfetched task.

Nonetheless, these people will be rather offended if you are to turn around and say, "What are you?" This is a great fear of the troglodyte; lest you forget that our beginnings were meager and shallow. While I would not say we are entirely made up of those we evolved from, there is evidence provided by this evolution that we can easily progress. Digress, for that matter.

To return to the statement, "[T]heir sickness or disease will become who they are"-- this is not to be fooled around with.

----I am diabetes. I am cancer. I am depression. I am autism. ----

These are barriers from a reality. The truth that is scarier than any disorder. There is no question that these will all be obstacles. They will prevent some things, explain other things. They often become light sabers in the paws of filthy inauthenticity. Not to the fault of the Jedi wielding his or her weapon, but to blame those who ("who" implying humanness; something questionable at all times) armed he or she in need as a defense to any criticism, fear, or challenge.

The same as we believe we can chain and conquer .... I lost my train of thought.

It simply seems to me that we have all been trained and given negative reinforcement in order to achieve less- based on our excuses (either externally or self-implanted.) We were then forced to live to a lower standard because of a fear that we will reach the border of our limit and be given a shock from the collar around our necks.

Did that sound revolutionary and slightly conspiracy theorist nuttist to you?
I hope so.

Here is a fine example of a moment of mania. If you've experienced manic episodes, you can sense it. Quickly written, poorly formulated... sometimes just jumbles of words thrown together because they sound poetic. I almost think that most of the beat poets were living in one long mania. Ginsberg and Kerouac... heck, even Pollock. The twist here is- these gentleman didn't know, nor did they care why they did as they did. They don't care why they offended and astonished people; why no one understood their art at the time; why they were unlike the majority.... It did not matter, they simply used their "flaws" to create and be better than the sad, boring majority.

It was complete release that set these men apart. As we can see in other artists. The ones who changed the world. Emily Dickinson was agoraphobic, so she wrote. Some were addicts, some were traumatized. They had undiagnosed, uncared about, untouched rawness and therefore, untainted talent. It's so extraordinary. It's beyond what the average human can comprehend.

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